Anyone who has been reading my blogs knows that I lost my mom in 2001.  For several years after she died, my dad became very lonely.  I think men need companionship sooner than women, when a spouse dies or there is a divorce.  I could be wrong, but this has proven itself to be true after my mom died, and after my own personal experience after my divorce.  We women need much more time to heal, and to seem to take a little longer to warm up to the thought of another relationship.  About a year after mom died, my dad began dating.  This did not go over well with my sister Tammy, and she made her thoughts clearly known to dad. I, on the other hand, kind of took up the role left by mom, so I knew how terribly lonely he was.  He would come to my house for supper, and I would go up to visit and clean the house, so I saw him frequently.  I will readily admit that it was hard to see him with another woman who was not my mom.  You wrestle with the guilty feelings that you are not honoring her memory by advocating the presence of another woman in his life.  Unfortunately my mom died just at the point in their lives when they were going to retire after many years of hard work, so now he had these plans and had found himself alone.

  Dad met Phyllis while we owned the Sweet Shop and pursued her even though she was dating another man.  I have a feeling he was relentless, and she finally agreed to a first date.  The rest, so to speak, was history.  Once again he was the happy man I remembered.  One day he and I were working in the office at the store at about 10 in the morning, I was doing book work and he was completing the deposit from the previous day.  He then gets up to go to the bank, I assumed, and said “Well I guess I will head home”.  I looked at him and said “Didn’t you just get here from home?”  He then winked at me, snickered his laugh that only Pops could snicker, and said “Maybe I haven’t been home yet!”, and out he went leaving me sitting there with my mouth wide open.  My mind was going a millions different directions….and then I smiled at this man in his 70’s as he let me know in a cryptic message that he and Phyllis were “official”.  This same man whos only advise to me when I started dating was to remember that “Men won’t buy the cow if they can get the milk free over the fence.”  We loved Phyllis at this point and I didn’t care if they lived on the moon, as long as they were happy.  Funny how things that you thought were right in your teenage years change as you mature and see life in a different perspective.

  Phyllis was now part of the family, and we shared birthdays, holidays, vacations, weddings and life changing events with each other.  She was there when my dad died, and was able to be one of the last people he saw before going into surgery.  She was sitting with us when they came out and said he had suffered  a cardiac arrest on the table, and she was with us throughout the funeral planning, visitation, funeral and burial.  They had both loved their spouses dearly while married, and were able to find each other for a few years of happiness before his death.  Again, God had closed 2 doors, but opened up 2 windows for them to meet.  She says that she will never find another “Pops” and was blessed to have him in her life for a short time.  She has continued to be in our lives since Dad died, and for that we are blessed as well.  I will never give up hope that some day there will be that “special” man that God will place in my life….for miracles happen every day they say  ♥


Chicken and Noodle Casserole

1 package noodles, cooked and drained

1- 12.5 oz can  white chicken breast

1 large can cream of chicken soup

1 cup (approx) of mayonnaise

diced onion, and green pepper (amount should be to your liking)

salt and pepper

Mix all ingredients together, and top with crushed potato chips. ( I crush about 1 cup of Durkees fried onions with the chips too)

Add a little milk if the casserole seems to be too thick.

Spread in a 9×13 casserole dish, cover and bake about 20 minutes at 350 degrees

Uncover and bake about 15 minutes more.


7 responses to “Phyllis

  1. Loved this story! I loved Pops, I used to tease him when she came in the shop. Remember how he would just laugh! Phyllis is a sweetie too!

  2. Well said Shelly I know mom misses him and so do I , the one thing that sticks in my head is his grin and that laugh I will never forget it, he was very very sweet to my mom, he was the best!

  3. Shelly had to get the tissues out, thank you for the kind words, i’m the one that’s
    blessed to have had your dad in my life he was a great guy and I gained a second
    family for life which is wonderful. I love you all, and no I don’t mind you telling our story. Love you all very much.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s