Critters…Keep Out!


I want to go on record to say that ‘I HATE CRITTERS’.  I know that there is a crazy eco-system spiel about nature and every critter is on this earth to eat another critter, but please stay away from my humble abode.  The other night my daughter convinced me to sit in the living room and watch a little of “Honey Boo Boo”…(that, in itself, is another blog)  We were sitting there and all of a sudden we see something circling the ceiling….it was a bat.  I swear the wingspan was about 3 foot!  Anyway, after tripping over each other to get out the door…sorry, with critters, it is each girlie for herself…..we stood on the porch screaming.  My 13-year-old then composes herself and trots across the street to get my brother-in-law, Mike.  I stand guard at the front door, watching this winged mouse circle the upstairs hallway.  I knew that the bathroom and both bedroom doors were wide open, but I could not will myself to  move from my spot to go up there.  Very soon Mike arrives with his son Jared and they head upstairs with a broom to find the Dracula sized monster.  Kelly, my sister arrives, only to laugh at me cause I am cowering on the porch, and proceeds to  head  upstairs to supervise.  I send Maddie up too, after reasoning with her that I needed to stay downstairs to be sure it didn’t come down.  They pound on walls, slam doors, flip on all of the lights and no critter is to be found.  I am almost in a panic because there was not way that bat was going to be allowed squatters rights at my home!!!!!  Kelly suggests that they look under curtains…and I shout upstairs “That’s a great idea!”  Jared then moves to my hallway window, lifts up the valance and calmly says “Here it is!”.  It was hanging behind the curtain, probably trying to get in the darkness.  I must admit to you that I just got a huge shiver after typing that last line.  I am then sent to go into my now dark backyard and get the pool net so they can extricate the flying nightmare.  I gladly left my position to rush and get the net.  I think he wanted to get out too, because it took Mike about 30 seconds to snag it, and let it go out in the front yard.  That thing was screeching and chirping the whole time, at least that’s what I though I heard while standing in my neighbor’s yard.

Maddie and I spent the next few evenings eyeing every ceiling as we passed through the house.  I have banned her from opening the front door after dark and tend to leave a lot of lights on in the evening.  I will admit that it is times like this, that I wish I had a big strong man around the house.  But when it was all over Maddie and I traded “high fives” because it was another problem we had solved.  GO GIRLIES!!!!  My friend Julie told me that night on Facebook that if it was dead to put it in a freezer bag and keep it frozen for the local health department. Apparently  they will take the bat and it could be check for rabies.   I know if we were in the same room when she said that, I would have to look to see if she had 2 heads…..because I don’t know what planet my friend came from, but there was no way that critter was sharing freezer space with my pizza, popsicles and frozen meats.  I saw it heading over to her house when Mike let it go…….peace and hair grease Jules!  ♥


I could not find a recipe that went with bats, so here is a great crock pot recipe….and easy….

Crock Pot Beef and Noodles

2 pounds stew meat

Large can Cream of Mushroom soup

2 envelopes of Lipton Onion Soup mix

One pound bag of egg noodles

Place stew meat on the bottom of the crock pot.

Spread the soup on top of the meat.

Sprinkle the soup mix over the soup.

Cover and cook on low for about 6 hours.

Uncover and break up the meat with a potato masher or gadget of your choice

Stir well and cook about 1 hour more.

     Serve over cooked egg noodles.

This is a double recipe, so if you have a smaller crock pot, just cut it in half.


2 responses to “Critters…Keep Out!

  1. I’m with you Shelly I would have been at the end of the block. I hate bats and
    mice get the chills just thinking about them guess i’m just a big chicken.

  2. Pingback: Critters…Keep Out! « Shelly's Stories

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